Crazy Heart

It's like I just lost control of it. 

The night my heart was given permission to remember. 

It was allowed to dream. 

It was allowed to break loose out of its chains. 

It was allowed to yearn, to believe... 

It went crazy. 


It wouldn't sleep. 

It wouldn't rest. 

It wouldn't subside any longer. 

It leaped and jolted me. 

It beat uncontrollably. 

It shook 

and became alive. 


Like a lone standing entity, 

it wouldn't let me sleep. 

I spoke to it. 

Quietly pleading, "chill, heart" 

and to no avail it wouldn't listen to me. 


So I wept. 


Tears fell and I was afraid. 


Afraid of its newfound freedom 

Afraid of its rebirth

Afraid of its vulnerability 


And its realization that it had been hushed 

and smothered 

to keep quiet. 


It was suffocating. 


And now...


It’s expanded...exploded, erupted with truth 

unashamed of its own candor. 


I closed my eyes and gasped for air 

as my heart celebrated without me. 

It danced wildly in hopes 

of possibility. 


crazy heart. 

just let me be. 


(written the night this happened.)