Love Without Commitment

"Feelings of love can create intimacy that overpowers reason. People too often are in a hurry to develop an intimate relationship based on their strong feelings. But feelings aren't enough to support a lasting relationship. This verse encourages us not to force romance lest the feelings of love grow faster than the commitment needed to make love last. Patiently wait for feelings of love and commitment to develop together." - Student's Life Application Bible (in reference to Song of Solomon 2:7)

I am not afraid to admit that I in the past have been guilty of allowing "feelings of love" whisk me away into the wonderful emotional realm of love. Before really taking my time to develop that commitment, both parties (him and I) moved at a rather rapid pace and allowed our strong emotional feelings to grow much faster than our decision to commit to one another. Needless to say, it ended rather painfully because of the premature strong emotional attachment. That heartbreak could have been avoided had I (and him) made a conscious decision to take our time and not include "romance" until we knew 100% that we were going to be together.

In Song of Solomon 2:7, Solomon advises us "...not to awaken love until the time is right." Here he is suggesting that we not rush into romance, sex or a relationship prematurely (which is before marriage).

I know that sometimes that is hard to do. When you develop a connection with someone and the chemistry is just right, sometimes all reason and logical thinking goes out the window. Those "feelings" make us feel like we are on top of the world and anything or anyone that tries to combat that is a "hater" or "jealous". But sometimes when our emotions are all stirred up, and we begin to feel like we are "in love" we don't realize that we are attempting to build a relationship with sticks instead of bricks. What I mean here is that, trying to build a strong successful relationship on strong connections, chemistry, and feelings alone (aka sticks), is not enough to keep that relationship together. As soon as those feelings and that emotional high dies down, or as soon as a rock is thrown, the relationship won't have anything left to hold it together. It will crumble. And this is when heartbreaks occur.

God wants us to experience the joy and beauty of relationships in its fullness. He doesn't want us to experience emotional heartbreak due to us giving ourselves away in exchange for emotional highs. He shows us clearly in His Word the benefit of waiting until the time is right. He shows us all we can experience if we wait until we decide to commit to a person before we get lost in those "feelings" of love. Consciously slowing down your fluttering heart when dating can give you both time to strengthen your relationship without the distraction of romance. Taking time to build your relationship with bricks means slowly allowing your feelings of love to grow with your mutual decision to commit. Then you will experience love and commitment in its fullness, exactly the way God designed for it to be all along.
Reference Scripture:
Song of Solomon 2:7 

Blurb: Solomon has become one of my favorite writers in the Bible. He challenges us by writing about topics that we rather not talk about. (He also wrote Proverbs & Ecclesiastes). In the book of Song of Solomon, Solomon eloquently writes of his love for his bride in the most endearing and poetic way. He depicts what God designed love to be like between a man and his wife. If you haven't read this book, I encourage you to read it and get a glimpse of the beautiful sanctity of marriage the way God intended.